For the 1st time after a very long while, I snapped.
Maybe its just too much, maybe enough is enough, maybe its just me.
Factors like cancer, like diabetes, like periodontitis, its multifactorial.
I asked myself, is it something i didnt do, or is it I tried too hard.
I accessed myself. I think I am a good friend. I'll go all out to help a friend. I'll send a frd home even if he/she stays in Jurong even if it damn out of the way. I've done that. But why am I always treated as a 2nd level friend. Someone not so impt, but available when help is needed. Someone who most doesnt care about, just notice his presence.
I always know that friendship aint that equal. There will always be someone that is more impt, that ppl will care about. I dun need to be that someone. I just need to know that at bare minimal my frds will help me in due time. Yet time and again, I am disappointed. I dun even need them to help coz I'm so used to doing things myself. But at least show a bit of care that you should as a frd instead of brushing me off like some bug, some dust.
I am worth much much more than that.
There are others that deserve my friendship more i guess.
At least i know i still have other friends. Friends that will at least care.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Saturday, May 20, 2006
34-2
Well.. one less to fight for triming machine, space to mount cast and of course instructors. She has decided to leave this sucky place for good. All I'll say is that its a pity, she has good hands. Still if its a calling, then go for it gal.
Like the card says You will be missed.
I guess many have written about this incident in their blog so dun think i need to explain further. Just be happy.
More on life in dental school.
Effectively 34 weeks more to complete 8 disciplines of competencies.
Future looks bleak.
Like the card says You will be missed.
I guess many have written about this incident in their blog so dun think i need to explain further. Just be happy.
More on life in dental school.
Effectively 34 weeks more to complete 8 disciplines of competencies.
Future looks bleak.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Bye Bye Bye
Well.. I lost my exam case. Honestly, I am not that happy about it. Especially after I've spent so much time on it. Its okay I guess. I just have to keep going on.
Was talking to one of my classmate, he was saying things about helping the slower ppl etc etc. Not that I am seriously in need of help, perhaps I am but I'm more of a lone ranger. But it will feel good if ppl mention ur name that are looking out for competencies cases for u.
Perhaps, I dun portrays to others that i am slow or whatever. But the truth is. I am. I dun need others to know coz there is nothing that they can do about it as well. But the realisation is quite shocking. I am almost behind for all subjects. No F/F issued till now, no class 2 done, no OHP, no FP case to start(coz its taken away). Worrying as it seems, I hope I can catch up. I just need to cases to do and I will do them. Maybe except for OHP.
Whatever it is. Time to work faster.
Was talking to one of my classmate, he was saying things about helping the slower ppl etc etc. Not that I am seriously in need of help, perhaps I am but I'm more of a lone ranger. But it will feel good if ppl mention ur name that are looking out for competencies cases for u.
Perhaps, I dun portrays to others that i am slow or whatever. But the truth is. I am. I dun need others to know coz there is nothing that they can do about it as well. But the realisation is quite shocking. I am almost behind for all subjects. No F/F issued till now, no class 2 done, no OHP, no FP case to start(coz its taken away). Worrying as it seems, I hope I can catch up. I just need to cases to do and I will do them. Maybe except for OHP.
Whatever it is. Time to work faster.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Bad Day
I should have known that today is gonna be a bad day. If u get spontaneous chest pain that radiates to ur arm and back with breathing difficulty while doing scaling and polishing for ur patient. Its either a sign of angina/AMI or simply a warning of a real bad day.
I am not able to see my 3rd patient for today (thankfully he is my cousin-in-law). That the 1st bad sign. But clinic overall wasnt that bad. In fact its pretty good. Yet, bad things r perhaps like snowball, they roll and get bigger.
My FP patient couldnt make it for his appointment that i have painstakingly changed with so many of my classmates, going throught the trouble to plan the timing for the whole term and try to ensure that he will be able to get his treatment ASAP. Perhaps, like i always say if there is a place that things doesnt go your way, it had to be dental school. Once again it is true.
Anyways the worse is yet to be. I was totally gone. I dunno what i am thinking, i dunno what i am saying. Problem lead to problem, misunderstanding leads to more misunderstanding. I have done my part to prepare, to discuss, should i deserve at least a clap for my effort. Instead I was shot down, grilled alive and yet none spoke. I was left to die. Until the raw nerve was triggered, I got real pissed, freaking pissed. I may not have all the knowledge, I may not have the experience, but I have my principles. Never question my intergrity, coz i feel that it is an utmost insult.
Anyways all in all things just doesnt go my way. My anger is kind of subsided now. So perhaps I cant write much anymore. Just wanna say that things does get better. I actually found my denture tooth that flew while i was trimming, to those who know what i meant its almost a miracle.
I am not able to see my 3rd patient for today (thankfully he is my cousin-in-law). That the 1st bad sign. But clinic overall wasnt that bad. In fact its pretty good. Yet, bad things r perhaps like snowball, they roll and get bigger.
My FP patient couldnt make it for his appointment that i have painstakingly changed with so many of my classmates, going throught the trouble to plan the timing for the whole term and try to ensure that he will be able to get his treatment ASAP. Perhaps, like i always say if there is a place that things doesnt go your way, it had to be dental school. Once again it is true.
Anyways the worse is yet to be. I was totally gone. I dunno what i am thinking, i dunno what i am saying. Problem lead to problem, misunderstanding leads to more misunderstanding. I have done my part to prepare, to discuss, should i deserve at least a clap for my effort. Instead I was shot down, grilled alive and yet none spoke. I was left to die. Until the raw nerve was triggered, I got real pissed, freaking pissed. I may not have all the knowledge, I may not have the experience, but I have my principles. Never question my intergrity, coz i feel that it is an utmost insult.
Anyways all in all things just doesnt go my way. My anger is kind of subsided now. So perhaps I cant write much anymore. Just wanna say that things does get better. I actually found my denture tooth that flew while i was trimming, to those who know what i meant its almost a miracle.
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